Tuesday, November 18, 2008

Confessions of Quiltaholics

This is a note Mollie sent both me and CCCAt after her and I visited Mrs. H's house.

Hi fellow Addicts:

I need help.....................yes, I entered into the world of a major problem yesterday and am finally realizing I have to reach out and ask others to join me in my sad state of "material addiction"! The symptoms are as follows in case you are going through the same malfunctions:

1. When older quilters pass away you are the first one at their door with a garbage bag hoping they left fabric behind.
2. You take any kind of fabric regardless of what "lies beneath" the surface, i.e. mouse droppings, roach eggs, bird poop, etc. Keeping in mind while sifting through the smelly, dirty, cluttered mess you can go home, wash it and it will be as good as new. (Your washer and dryer may have to be replaced, but what the heck - it was free fabric!)
3. You go to bed at midnight after separating the stash you have just received and then toss and turn all night waiting for the first sign of daylight so you can take one load out of the washer and put the next one in.
4. Get up up at o'dark 30 pretending to go to the bathroom, but sneak out of the bedroom, close the door and make your way to the dryer where you take out the first load washed and get a thrill out of seeing what you actually brought home.
5. Standing for hours folding, caressing, and admiring fabric you normally would not have bought at any cost due to it's low thread count and color content - but, what the heck - it was FREE!!!!
6. Drinking coffee, trying to concentrate on other important things in life (like learning lines for an upcoming play), but descending into the fabricaholic world after each sip.
7. Dreaming up ways to use the hundreds of yards of fabric already amassed from a now admitted addiction of over 20 years and trying to figure out a clever way to let others know without causing a "snit" among fellow quilters.
8. Sending out a plea for others in the same shape to join me and maybe we can overcome this terrible malady by becoming one combined union of quiltaholics and leave this world a better place.


The note I sent back to them....
As with any 12 step program, the only way to fix your problem is to first admit that you have a problem. I too am ready to enter this scary arena. I am ready to "talk" at this, the first meeting of our sad and pathetic group.....

My name is Morah. I am a fabricholic and I have been "new fabric free" for 24 hours. One little online fabric purchase could push me over, back to the dark side so I am here to maintain the strength to remain "new fabric free." .

I too have been sucked into the dark abyss of another womens version of "a sewing room." Mouse droppings, bird poo and roach eggs posed no threat as I merrily dug through bags and drawers determined not to miss even one fabric treasure.

I have been caught in the "I have to buy something and use this coupon because today is the last day" syndrome. Circling and circling Joanns just to find something to buy so as not to lose the 40% off.

I have derived intense, almost sexual pleasure, while shop hopping with friends AND in finding the last fat quarter of a much coveted fabric While my quilty friends all wish that they had found it first.

I've been known to walk through a fabric shop with my hand bouncing off of bolts of fabric like Huck Finn walking along a fence with a stick. Humming generally accompanies this activity.

I don't really, really, care that there is no way, in my lifetime, that I will use the fabric I own now let alone what I may buy once I fall off the wagon. Ownership is half of the art of quilting.

Like Mollie, I too enter an almost trance like state when folding, stacking or rearranging fabric, regardless of color, type, or quality. The aura of calm surrounds me for just so long before I begin to suffer withdrawal symptoms. These symptom can usually be fended off by at least sitting in my sewing room for 30 mins. per day.
I have been known to drag unsuspecting friends into my periods of fabric frenzy.

When I'm not acquiring fabric, thinking about fabric or wondering how I'm going to use my fabric, I am reading about fabric, blogging about it or surfing the web for new ways to buy fabric.

For these an many more reasons, I'd too would like to be a part of your 12 step program....as soon as I find a reformed quilter who no longer overindulges in fabric purchases to be my sponsor, I'll be on my way to recovery.


This is the note CCCat sent back. About 10 months ago, one of our friends, "K" quit quilting and gave away all of her stuff.

Do you suppose we could enlist "K" to be our sponsor? I can't think of anyone else who is a "reformed quilter" to help us. I always thought it was "once a quilter, always a quilter" until "K" reformed. She must have been so slightly infected by the quilting bug that her body and mind threw it off or discovered a vaccine for it. As far as for me, forget the vaccine. I'd rather tough it out (or fall off the wagon). I can't help but think of all those babies growing up now who will have a chance to go through my stash. They will have a ball!

I thought these correspondences were absolutely hysterical!!!!


Joyce said...

If I didn't live several thousand miles away from Texas I would have been right there with you among the mouse droppings etc. I guess that makes me a fabriholic too.

Suzan said...

Your posting made me laugh out loud...mostly because it was so easy to recognize those same traits in myself. I honestly did not know that anyone else did the bolt touching, humming thing!

Elaine Adair said...

My name is Elaine Adair, and today, I emptied my sewing room waste basket WITHOUT going through it first. 8-)

I am on the road to recovery.

Jane's Fabrics and Quilts said...

My husband is wondering why I am laughing out load, I am gone and there is no help in site, if I go, give me your address!!!


Related Posts with Thumbnails